As we only have a month left and are wondering what in the world comes next, it is great to be reminded today why I don't have to worry about the future.
From Justin Taylor:
Eight Reasons Why My Anxiety Is Pointless and Foolish
Read the rest here
(Found on takeyourvitaminz)
Showing posts with label The Word. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Word. Show all posts
Thursday, May 03, 2012
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
More than many sparrows
I love birds, well, most of them anyway. I started acquiring bird things a bit before we left, not that I want to start a creepy, hipster collection, but I just ended up with quite a few things. They remind me that God is good, he is a provider, and he is sovereign over my life. They remind me that God cares for me.
Rebecca has two full walls of windows and lots of bird feeders outside both of them. It is so much fun to watch all the lovely birds from her room. It is just one of the little things about this place that make it so delightful.
Rebecca has two full walls of windows and lots of bird feeders outside both of them. It is so much fun to watch all the lovely birds from her room. It is just one of the little things about this place that make it so delightful.
Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?
(Matthew 6:26-27 ESV)
O LORD, how manifold are your works!
In wisdom have you made them all;
the earth is full of your creatures.
Here is the sea, great and wide,
which teems with creatures innumerable,
living things both small and great.
There go the ships,
and Leviathan, which you formed to play in it.
These all look to you,
to give them their food in due season.
When you give it to them, they gather it up;
when you open your hand, they are filled with good things.
When you hide your face, they are dismayed;
when you take away their breath, they die
and return to their dust.
When you send forth your Spirit, they are created,
and you renew the face of the ground.
(Psalm 104:24-30 ESV)
Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows.
(Luke 12:6-7 ESV)
For every beast of the forest is mine,
the cattle on a thousand hills.
I know all the birds of the hills,
and all that moves in the field is mine.
(Psalm 50:10-11 ESV)
Even the sparrow finds a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may lay her young,
at your altars, O LORD of hosts,
my King and my God.
Blessed are those who dwell in your house,
ever singing your praise! Selah
(Psalm 84:3-4 ESV)
For a day in your courts is better
than a thousand elsewhere.
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
For the LORD God is a sun and shield;
the LORD bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
from those who walk uprightly.
O LORD of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you!
(Psalm 84:10-12 ESV)
And he said to his disciples, “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat, nor about your body, what you will put on. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing. Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds! And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? If then you are not able to do as small a thing as that, why are you anxious about the rest? Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass, which is alive in the field today, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not seek what you are to eat and what you are to drink, nor be worried. For all the nations of the world seek after these things, and your Father knows that you need them. Instead, seek his kingdom, and these things will be added to you.
“Fear not, little flock, for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom. Sell your possessions, and give to the needy. Provide yourselves with moneybags that do not grow old, with a treasure in the heavens that does not fail, where no thief approaches and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.
(Luke 12:22-34 ESV)
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Grace upon grace upon grace
As I have probably said before, I am learning so much these days. So much about myself and my heart, my wants, desires, dreams, hopes for the future; and so much about the Lord; his Word, his heart towards me, and his promises.
I posted this link on facebook to a Desiring God blog the other day called "God Loves Good Wine." It talks about the difference between growing grapes for bulk, cheap wines and growing grapes for high quality wines. Basically, the grapes for high quality wines are grown in a more trying climate to make the grapes more rich and flavorful. The vines have to be stressed to produce really good fruit. I feel like that parallels my time here. Not that it is so horrible here. It is wonderful, but it is difficult. It is different. There is not a lot of rest. There is a lot of moving and a lot of serving. A lot of weariness, but there is much grace in the toil.
I feel like now that I have gotten used to the tasks a bit, that they have gotten easier in that I know more of what I need to do, but much, much, harder knowing that I have to do them all the time. I am having much more of a hard time being thankful for them and a much harder time resting in the Lord's grace for all of it. I asked the Lord today to teach me what it means to be his servant. To be his slave. Not that I feel like a slave, that would be a major exaggeration, but sometimes it is difficult for me to be constantly at someone else's disposal. I am having to pray for the heart of a servant daily. When I am pleasant, or quick to do something on the outside, I am groaning on the inside and I don't want to be groaning.
I am learning what it means to lean on the Father strength. I am learning to submit my constant cares to Him. I am learning how much I still have to learn.
The themes the Father has been repeating to me have been the concept of being poured out, and only one thing being necessary. Basically, that my life is not my own and I am to be poured out as a blessing wherever God places me, and that I only need to focus on Jesus and knowing him in his Word and the other things will flow out of that.
That really only scratches the surface of things, but alas, my mind is already slipping away. I suppose that will do for now. :)
I posted this link on facebook to a Desiring God blog the other day called "God Loves Good Wine." It talks about the difference between growing grapes for bulk, cheap wines and growing grapes for high quality wines. Basically, the grapes for high quality wines are grown in a more trying climate to make the grapes more rich and flavorful. The vines have to be stressed to produce really good fruit. I feel like that parallels my time here. Not that it is so horrible here. It is wonderful, but it is difficult. It is different. There is not a lot of rest. There is a lot of moving and a lot of serving. A lot of weariness, but there is much grace in the toil.
I feel like now that I have gotten used to the tasks a bit, that they have gotten easier in that I know more of what I need to do, but much, much, harder knowing that I have to do them all the time. I am having much more of a hard time being thankful for them and a much harder time resting in the Lord's grace for all of it. I asked the Lord today to teach me what it means to be his servant. To be his slave. Not that I feel like a slave, that would be a major exaggeration, but sometimes it is difficult for me to be constantly at someone else's disposal. I am having to pray for the heart of a servant daily. When I am pleasant, or quick to do something on the outside, I am groaning on the inside and I don't want to be groaning.
I am learning what it means to lean on the Father strength. I am learning to submit my constant cares to Him. I am learning how much I still have to learn.
The themes the Father has been repeating to me have been the concept of being poured out, and only one thing being necessary. Basically, that my life is not my own and I am to be poured out as a blessing wherever God places me, and that I only need to focus on Jesus and knowing him in his Word and the other things will flow out of that.
That really only scratches the surface of things, but alas, my mind is already slipping away. I suppose that will do for now. :)
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Grace through trial
My mind is bursting with all that I am learning. I feel like a balloon that is about to pop.
I am learning so much practically, all the care taking duties, medicine schedules, trying to pick up some french, and just a lot of little details. But I feel like I am learning so much more spiritually. My spirit was so exhausted yesterday evening and I was so overwhelmed with everything the Father is teaching me. It is definitely all good, but sometimes I just don't know how in the world to take it all in.
I have been struggling the past several days with a bit of spiritual oppression. The first day it was an encompassing sense of sadness, not really about anything in particular, but over everything. The second day it was a sense of accusation and guilt. Yesterday, I was tempted to question God about everything. I am learning so much and growing so much, but I can feel the tempter feeling his way around and trying to find my weak spot, trying to get me to despair over everything. I think he knows he is losing. (These are things that I struggle with a lot of the time, but never in such an overwhelming sense in quite a while. That is why I think it is spiritual warfare. Just in case you were wondering. :) )
I asked Rebecca to pray about it at bedtime the second day and she told me that those things are extremely common in this area of Europe. She said, "well that is silly to carry it around all this time." :) She prayed boldly and with authority in Jesus name for me and I feel some of the burden lifted. Rebecca also said that I need to strengthen my spiritual armor, so I have been diving into Ephesians 6 and feel like I have been really learning to "pray at all times in the Spirit, with prayer and supplication." Every time I feel the heat of accusation or the whisper in my ear questioning God's goodness, sovereignty, and love; I just shoot it right back up to the Lord and submit it to him.
I'm not going to lie. It is hard and it is exhausting, but it is so good. I have been reading and re-reading Romans 8 and abiding in, "there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." Ah, what relief! What a refuge! I have received the spirit of adoption as his child and I can cry "Abba Father!" I am helped in my weakness and I am interceded for by the Spirit. "If God is for me, who can be against me?" Who can bring any charge against me? "It is God who justifies. Nothing can separate me from the love of Christ.
I am being filled to the brim and running over. The Father is breaking and healing my heart repeatedly here and filling me with his joy and his strength. It is exhausting and mind blowing and shattering; it is amazing and miraculous and joyous that the Father would care to discipline me, to change me and grow me as he is doing.
It is amazing, when you stop complaining and start thanking the Lord for everything, even the seemingly bad things, how much there is to be thankful for and how much of everything I have is a blessing and not a right.
I love this place, I love these people, and I am so thankful for them and how God is using them and this place to change my heart and glorify himself. Oh, and how much more there is to come. :)
Shane & Shane
"Embracing Accusation"
"The father of lies
Coming to steal
Kill and destroy
All my hopes of being good enough
I hear him saying cursed are the ones
Who can’t abide
He’s right
Alleluia he’s right!
The devil is preaching
The song of the redeemed
That I am cursed and gone astray
I cannot gain salvation
Embracing accusation
Could the father of lies
Be telling the truth
Of God to me tonight?
If the penalty of sin is death
Then death is mine
I hear him saying cursed are the ones
Who can’t abide
He’s right
Alleluia he’s right!
Oh the devil’s singing over me
An age old song
That I am cursed and gone astray
Singing the first verse so conveniently
He’s forgotten the refrain
Jesus saves!
He redeemed us from the curse of the law."
I am learning so much practically, all the care taking duties, medicine schedules, trying to pick up some french, and just a lot of little details. But I feel like I am learning so much more spiritually. My spirit was so exhausted yesterday evening and I was so overwhelmed with everything the Father is teaching me. It is definitely all good, but sometimes I just don't know how in the world to take it all in.
I have been struggling the past several days with a bit of spiritual oppression. The first day it was an encompassing sense of sadness, not really about anything in particular, but over everything. The second day it was a sense of accusation and guilt. Yesterday, I was tempted to question God about everything. I am learning so much and growing so much, but I can feel the tempter feeling his way around and trying to find my weak spot, trying to get me to despair over everything. I think he knows he is losing. (These are things that I struggle with a lot of the time, but never in such an overwhelming sense in quite a while. That is why I think it is spiritual warfare. Just in case you were wondering. :) )
I asked Rebecca to pray about it at bedtime the second day and she told me that those things are extremely common in this area of Europe. She said, "well that is silly to carry it around all this time." :) She prayed boldly and with authority in Jesus name for me and I feel some of the burden lifted. Rebecca also said that I need to strengthen my spiritual armor, so I have been diving into Ephesians 6 and feel like I have been really learning to "pray at all times in the Spirit, with prayer and supplication." Every time I feel the heat of accusation or the whisper in my ear questioning God's goodness, sovereignty, and love; I just shoot it right back up to the Lord and submit it to him.
I'm not going to lie. It is hard and it is exhausting, but it is so good. I have been reading and re-reading Romans 8 and abiding in, "there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." Ah, what relief! What a refuge! I have received the spirit of adoption as his child and I can cry "Abba Father!" I am helped in my weakness and I am interceded for by the Spirit. "If God is for me, who can be against me?" Who can bring any charge against me? "It is God who justifies. Nothing can separate me from the love of Christ.
I am being filled to the brim and running over. The Father is breaking and healing my heart repeatedly here and filling me with his joy and his strength. It is exhausting and mind blowing and shattering; it is amazing and miraculous and joyous that the Father would care to discipline me, to change me and grow me as he is doing.
It is amazing, when you stop complaining and start thanking the Lord for everything, even the seemingly bad things, how much there is to be thankful for and how much of everything I have is a blessing and not a right.
I love this place, I love these people, and I am so thankful for them and how God is using them and this place to change my heart and glorify himself. Oh, and how much more there is to come. :)
Shane & Shane
"Embracing Accusation"
"The father of lies
Coming to steal
Kill and destroy
All my hopes of being good enough
I hear him saying cursed are the ones
Who can’t abide
He’s right
Alleluia he’s right!
The devil is preaching
The song of the redeemed
That I am cursed and gone astray
I cannot gain salvation
Embracing accusation
Could the father of lies
Be telling the truth
Of God to me tonight?
If the penalty of sin is death
Then death is mine
I hear him saying cursed are the ones
Who can’t abide
He’s right
Alleluia he’s right!
Oh the devil’s singing over me
An age old song
That I am cursed and gone astray
Singing the first verse so conveniently
He’s forgotten the refrain
Jesus saves!
He redeemed us from the curse of the law."
Thursday, March 08, 2012
Homesick zombies make feeble attempts at the learning...you know...stuff
I had no idea jet lag could be this bad. When people would talk about it I would think, "big deal, you just stay up all day and then go to bed when you are supposed to and then everything will be fine." Wow, oh wow, was I wrong. Yesterday I felt like the living dead all day and I went to bed right after dinner so I could be competent enough to do the midnight turn. I don't think I have ever been to bed at seven before. I feel like I am in a constant fog, even if I have slept enough, and I haven't been able to sleep very well.
Kayla and I both couldn't sleep last night, so we got to talk for a bit. It was the first extended conversation we've had since we got here.
Yesterday was our first day without Jordan; I think it was rougher on us because of that. I feel like I am constantly doing something wrong and always have to be corrected. I know that I am just learning, and Rebecca is extremely gracious, but I am hard on myself and want to do everything perfectly the first time around. Especially since I am so tired, I don't get things as fast as I normally would and I am slow to move or slow to hear what I am asked to do. Then there are the times when there are a bit of a cultural barrier and I am looking for something that I know of as one thing by the same name and it turns out to be something completely different. *sigh*
I think I automatically see disapproving glances and think others don't think well of me because I am so frustrated with myself, whether they are really there or not. Pray for us to be gracious, especially when we are tired and frustrated with ourselves that we aren't learning faster. Pray for graciousness to be extended to us when we are slow to act or comprehend. Pray for us to get into the groove of things quickly and please, please, please, pray for our bodies to adjust to the time quickly and for us to feel totally well.
Rebecca is lovely and we are enjoying getting to know her and Paul. It is great living with people who are so in love with the Lord and extend grace to everyone around them. I am already so thankful for their presence in our lives and I feel that the Lord will teach us much through them.
This morning was a bit of a whirlwind as we were getting ready for visitors to come to tea. Kayla and I briefly met the First Prince and Princess of Belgium this morning! Pretty cool. They came to pray with Paul and Rebecca about the Prayer Breakfasts that Paul started here in Belgium. We also met another of Paul's friends who was very kind and spoke to us for a bit. I think that he is the pastor over the Prayer Breakfast here.
The more we do everything, I'm sure it will get easier. It is just the firsts of everything that is very hard. We both cannot believe that this is only the fifth day of us being here. It feels like an eternity right now. I just have to get through each moment, I cannot even think of getting through this one day, or I feel like I will fall over. I have to plead for grace and strength from the Lord for every moment, for every unpleasant task, and for everything I feel unqualified for.
I am learning so much and am doing things waaaaaaaaaay outside my comfort zone. Sometimes I am barely making it and sometimes I can smile through it. Each time in the Word is becoming precious and I am learning to lean on the Lord for strength in every moment. I read Isaiah 40 this morning as I was quickly eating breakfast and was encouraged that the Lord says,
"Comfort, comfort, my people..."1
"The grass withers, the flower fade when the breath of the LORD blows on it. surely the people are grass. The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever." 7-8
"Behold, the Lord GOD comes with might, and his arm rules for him; behold, his reward is with him, and his recompense before him. He will tend his flock like a shepherd; he will gather the lambs in his arms; he will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are with young." 10-11
"Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint." 28-31 (All ESV)
The Word is becoming more of a balm and strength to my tired soul every day.
I have also never understood true homesickness until now. Last night I just wanted to hug my Mom and have a good cry, and remembered that she is way on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean, plus more than halfway across America. Hopefully, we will be able to find a time to skype soon, but our different schedules plus the eight hour time difference make things difficult. I have gotten to talk to my brothers a bit, which was nice We can receive texts for free, but can't really send many back. If any of you wanted to text us, that would be fine. :)
Miss all of you and praying that the Lord is working in your lives as He is certainly moving in ours.
Love!
Kayla and I both couldn't sleep last night, so we got to talk for a bit. It was the first extended conversation we've had since we got here.
Yesterday was our first day without Jordan; I think it was rougher on us because of that. I feel like I am constantly doing something wrong and always have to be corrected. I know that I am just learning, and Rebecca is extremely gracious, but I am hard on myself and want to do everything perfectly the first time around. Especially since I am so tired, I don't get things as fast as I normally would and I am slow to move or slow to hear what I am asked to do. Then there are the times when there are a bit of a cultural barrier and I am looking for something that I know of as one thing by the same name and it turns out to be something completely different. *sigh*
I think I automatically see disapproving glances and think others don't think well of me because I am so frustrated with myself, whether they are really there or not. Pray for us to be gracious, especially when we are tired and frustrated with ourselves that we aren't learning faster. Pray for graciousness to be extended to us when we are slow to act or comprehend. Pray for us to get into the groove of things quickly and please, please, please, pray for our bodies to adjust to the time quickly and for us to feel totally well.
Rebecca is lovely and we are enjoying getting to know her and Paul. It is great living with people who are so in love with the Lord and extend grace to everyone around them. I am already so thankful for their presence in our lives and I feel that the Lord will teach us much through them.
This morning was a bit of a whirlwind as we were getting ready for visitors to come to tea. Kayla and I briefly met the First Prince and Princess of Belgium this morning! Pretty cool. They came to pray with Paul and Rebecca about the Prayer Breakfasts that Paul started here in Belgium. We also met another of Paul's friends who was very kind and spoke to us for a bit. I think that he is the pastor over the Prayer Breakfast here.
The more we do everything, I'm sure it will get easier. It is just the firsts of everything that is very hard. We both cannot believe that this is only the fifth day of us being here. It feels like an eternity right now. I just have to get through each moment, I cannot even think of getting through this one day, or I feel like I will fall over. I have to plead for grace and strength from the Lord for every moment, for every unpleasant task, and for everything I feel unqualified for.
I am learning so much and am doing things waaaaaaaaaay outside my comfort zone. Sometimes I am barely making it and sometimes I can smile through it. Each time in the Word is becoming precious and I am learning to lean on the Lord for strength in every moment. I read Isaiah 40 this morning as I was quickly eating breakfast and was encouraged that the Lord says,
"Comfort, comfort, my people..."1
"The grass withers, the flower fade when the breath of the LORD blows on it. surely the people are grass. The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever." 7-8
"Behold, the Lord GOD comes with might, and his arm rules for him; behold, his reward is with him, and his recompense before him. He will tend his flock like a shepherd; he will gather the lambs in his arms; he will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are with young." 10-11
"Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint." 28-31 (All ESV)
The Word is becoming more of a balm and strength to my tired soul every day.
I have also never understood true homesickness until now. Last night I just wanted to hug my Mom and have a good cry, and remembered that she is way on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean, plus more than halfway across America. Hopefully, we will be able to find a time to skype soon, but our different schedules plus the eight hour time difference make things difficult. I have gotten to talk to my brothers a bit, which was nice We can receive texts for free, but can't really send many back. If any of you wanted to text us, that would be fine. :)
Miss all of you and praying that the Lord is working in your lives as He is certainly moving in ours.
Love!
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